I'm Friday-tired! By Friday, I'll be ready for retirement. Wow. That went fast. And yet I still don't feel a day over 32...
The boys swam and swam and swam today. For two hours, they swam. They played underwater games. They burned up energy they'd been saving for Christmas. They had a great time.
Today was evidently Negligent Parent Day at the pool. All around the pool and on floating islands in the deep end were oiled women basking with their eyes closed, while over in the shallow end, there was me and seven children, only three of which were mine. The only ones over the ripe old age of four were my oldest two. My arms hurt. My back hurts. But mostly, my heart hurts. It shouldn't be some strange lady whose name you don't know who cheers you on when you get the diving stick. It shouldn't be a total stranger who catches your trusting little body as you jump into the big pool. And if you can't swim, your parents should, at the very least, have their eyes open while you're in the water. (I would say they should be IN the water, but at this point, I'd be happy with a little recognition that these little people are somehow your responsibility!! Come on, people!)
One little guy, in particular, just really tugged at my heartstrings. He was so enthusiastic and ready to do anything Smidge was doing. He jumped over and over and over again, and we motored all around the shallow end. He retrieved the ball for Smidge when it got too far away. He is three. He was very tired (too tired to be in the water anymore), and would try with all his might to swim over to his mother's floating island to get her attention. His head would dip under and water filled his mouth. You could see him focusing on her, trying not to panic, but unable to get anything out, to call for help. More than once I lifted him up so he could catch his breath and then he asked to come back with us to the edge of the pool rather than going back to the middle to his mother. I set him on the edge and helped him relax a bit. I love children, and as long as they aren't endangering my children, I'm willing to welcome any child to join us in play. But that's not what this is about - this woman is going to spend this child's 15th year wondering what happened to "the sweet little boy" she didn't have time for, and it's going to be ugly. The only contact she responded to was once, when Smidge threw a fit (it was naptime, and we were almost ready to go), she screamed at her boy, demanding to know what he was doing over there and to leave us alone. *groan*
As much as I wanted to say something, that really would not have made things better for those kids, or probably - considering the language that was flying when these women weren't angry - for mine, either. While a poolside catfight might inspire some folks, it's not going to encourage anyone to make positive parenting changes. So what do you do? You let the kids laugh with you and you share with them the words of encouragement you share with your children. You catch them when they jump, and pick them up when they sink. And when you're home again, with just your children, you pull your own children closer and hug them just a little tighter, and hope...
Kiss those babies!
~Dy
5 comments:
That makes me either want to cry or slug someone. Well, truthfully, a bit of both. Instead, I followed what *should* have been my first impulse and said a prayer.
That's growth, right?
Glad your boys had fun. :~)
We're learning, Kathy. We're learning. I had the same conflicting emotions, and came to the same final conclusion. Model what we'd like to see more of, in all areas of our lives, right? It's humbling, to say the least.
The wonderful thing about children is that they don't notice the grown-up issues. All the kids played together as if they'd come for that purpose, kwim? No contention, it was sweet.
Dy
I know what you mean! We just let the children join in with whatever we are doing.
Our neighbor is like that. I swear, in the year and a half that they have lived here, I have never once seen her be affectionate or speak encouragement to him when he does some great kid thing. Kevin and I are the ones saying, way to go and good job! It makes me want to hurt her, that sounds awful, I know.
I guess we can be thankful that we are here, we are giving them something at least.
You may be all he needs to realize there is something better in this world, and strive to become that. I'm sorry for the heartbreak though. :-(
BTW, I feel like it's Friday as well!
That's just SO sad.The poor little guy. Of course,you were right to restrain yourself from knocking that greased woman off of her raft.
But, it sure would've felt good if you could've ,eh?;0)
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