Yesterday. Was. Hard.
If I was going to cry, "Uncle!" Yesterday would have been the day. But I didn't. (Neither did they.) And we made it. Everybody went to bed knowing they are loved. Always. The sun came up today, and what do you know, it's a better day already. I guess that's what days like that are good for. If you're always on your best behavior and everyone adores you, then you can start to wonder if they really love you, warts and all. But, when you've really pushed the limits, and you've really tested the boundaries, and somebody can be purple-faced with frustration and tongue-biting and still look you in the eye and say, "I love you with all my heart. What you're doing is not okay, and you need to stop, but I still love you right now." Wow.
It's hard to do that sometimes. I never saw that, growing up. I didn't know if I'd be able to do it as a parent. But yeah, it's good. It's worth doing. It's worth doing, even when, or especially when, it's the hardest thing in the world to do.
I'm sorry we didn't get to make a video for Dad. I'm sorry we didn't get to call Gram. I'm sorry we weren't up for taking on the icy bridge into town. But amidst all the things I'm sorry for, I don't have to add any of the guilty-parenting thing. I'm glad I didn't lose my temper. I'm glad that when we sat down to write out the rules of the house, the boys were the first ones to explain why each rule is so important. I'm glad that when I reminded them that we're ALL subject to the rules of the house, including me, they didn't roll their eyes. *grin*
So, yeah, while the day had me in a pretty rugged half-nelson, it was okay. I didn't get pinned, and for that I'm thankful.
Kiss those babies!
~Dy
6 comments:
Do you give lessons? Please, please, tell me you give lessons!
Good stuff Dy. You are awesome!
mere
Oh, no. You don't want to do this the way I have! LOL! This is serious trial-n-error parenting, here. *whew*
I actually owe any of my improved parenting skills to Zorak, who has had a tremendously calming effect on me in many ways. (Not in all ways, much to his chagrin, but in many ways.)
When all else fails, I just remember that eventually they have to go to sleep. And if I can rein it in enough to read, talk, and snuggle with them before I turn out the lights, that helps. I'm getting better about being able to do that. By that time of the day, truly, all I want is quiet. I want everybody to stop touching each other, stop talking, stop fidgeting, and *whispering* just. be. quiet. Doesn't happen that way, but that's okay. They're little. They do that. :-S
Dy
Oh Dy, I'm glad you (& the children) made it through the day. It must be in the air, because it seems like everyone (me included) is having a rough time with the kiddos.
Rebel
But the lessons are oh so important to learn, aren't they? And sometimes it's hard, and in life, we learn by doing, and sometimes re-doing. But when those lessons are learned in love and compassion it makes the discipline all that much easier to swallow.
Keep it up, girlfriend.
**Hugs**
-dawn
Way to go, I wish I had the patience to step back and not get upset. I'm one of those people that if my plans get changed I have a meltdown. I'm working on it, but it is really hard. My Mom always tells me "this too shall pass" and "to get to the valley you have to climb the mountain", so I always try to remember that.
I agree that it must be in the air. The cold weather here has wreaked havoc on my kids- the boys can't stand being cooped up so much and eventually they get their sister roped into their mischief. It's enough to make a grown woman fall to her knees and beg for Spring. Now. ;)
I love the way you describe your challenging days. It's such an inspiration to the rest of us!
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