Monday, March 20

It's Dead... (rated R, for language and government rants)

My phone, that is. It's been sickly for a while, and we saw this coming. Still, it's a bit of a shock to find yourself without a cell phone. Just wake up and thhhbbttt. It's dead.

I took it to the Verizon technician to see what it would cost to fix the problem (because, of course it's out of warranty and we're three months away from the standard now-we've-got-you-for-another-two-years upgrade). Answered the gazillion questions they ask - what's the problem, what's it doing, how long has it been doing it, and what have you done to resolve the problem. OK, pick it up at three. Well, we weren't staying in town until three, so I just called.

Had to laugh, because when I called the conversation went like this:

CSR - "Well, it won't take a charge."
Me - Um... yeah, I know. That's why I dropped it off.
CSR - "It says it's charging, but it's not."
(Long, awkward pause, as I wait for them to provide me with information I haven't provided them already.)
Me - Aaaannnnddd?
CSR - "Well, there's a few things you can do. You can see if a friend has a phone they don't want. You can purchase a new phone, retail, of course. Or you can buy one off eBay."
Me - What would it cost to fix it?
CSR - "It won't take a charge."
Me - So it can't be fixed?
CSR - "Well, it won't take a charge."
Me - No SHIT, it won't take a charge!* I am well aware of that. Why can't it be fixed? (*That first part was in my head. I don't swear at the poor sap who got stuck answering the phone.)
CSR - "Um, the software won't let us fix it."

Well, okay, it's THEIR software. Are they telling me they coded it to do this? Or that their technician can't be bothered with "software issues"? Did he work for Microsoft before coming to work for Verizon? Bah. I hate planned obsolescence.

We have two old phones, but I don't think they have GPS capabilities. (Yet another Federal mandate in the name of "the people", designed to complicate our lives, waste our tax money, and control our spending habits. Bastards. And we're the idiots who allow things like this to be passed. As much as I appreciate certain things the FCC does, I think it's outlived its usefulness and is now overstepping its bounds out of sheer boredom.)

And if I had a compliant phone, I'd be on it right now, wasting my minutes to make that clear to someone in DC.

Dy, off to piss and moan to the congressman who will never see my email

8 comments:

Melora said...

Infuriating! As a 40 year old techno-dunce, it makes me boil when I call tech support and find myself talking to someone who is less well-informed than I am after reading the "help" page. I guess what really went wrong with your phone, from their p.o.v., was that it went ka-put Before the "have a free phone on us" offer was scheduled to come up.
I like to mail And e-mail my remarks to my representatives, on the theory that that doubles my (admittedly miniscule) chance of being noted.
Cordially,
Melora

Pilot Mom said...

Just last month ours finally bit the dust in the very same way. Have you bought a new battery? We went to Verizon and since our phone was so old, they didn't sell the old battery. However, they guy was so nice to tell us of Batteries Plus. They sell all kinds of older model number batteries. Ours cost only $29.99. I'm not sure if they are nation wide. I'd never heard of them before but I am now a big huge fan!!! :) If not, you can send me the model number of your cell phone and the make and I'll check it out for you. I'd be more than happy to do it.

melissa said...

Hey! Congrats for not swearing at the guy on the phone! Way to Go! I am pretty sure that I would have. Probably using those exact words!

My answer to the cell phone dilema is the "pay as you go" phone. LOVE IT! LOVE IT! I don't have a bill, I don't have a contract and I don't have to talk to ANY "tech"....ever. And if the sucker ever dies, I'll toss it in the trash and buy another!

Sorry for your frustrations...ugh.

Amy Pearson Photography said...

I feel your pain. Our tech wouldn't understand that I really wasn't trying to mooch another phone when I left ours on the roof of the van and it went sliding down the highway.
Have you ever heard of www.freecycle.org? Sign up for one in your local area and ask for a phone. I'd be surprised if you DIDN'T get one for free. (I just got a laptop computer!!! And kitchen chairs, and . . . and . . .and . . . )

J-Lynn said...

Yup. I'm not happy with them either but we're under contract as well. Master/slave. *sigh*

Geo is pissed at the FCC anyway becuase he still doens't have his call sign...LOL

Heather said...

I might know someone who has a phone you can borrow until your contract is ready for a new phone ;-) I also might have a contact at Verizon (a manager even!) who would be willing to have a listen and take a look to see if there is anything that can be done NOW to get this problem resolved. You do have a phone that works somewhere in the house right? I'll email you his phone number. XOXO
Heather

Anonymous said...

My husband is so anti-Big Brother he disabled the GPS capability in my cell phone. (God help me if I ever go off a cliff in Monterey and plunge into the Pacific Ocean and nobody can find me or my truck!)

I feel for ya with the CSR on the phone. My dh used to do tech support over the phone (not for a cell phone company though) and he said it was the worst job he had in his life (100 times worse the the Army could ever hope to be). (At least in the Army you know when the ds drops you and tells you to do "more pushups" at least you're getting your exercise for the day.-grin-)--ack it's early-and I'm not sure where i was going with that comment in the paren's. :-)

-dawn aka: she who needs more sleep before she comments on someone's blog

Heidi said...

Dear Jess,
Look here for the call sign:
http://callsign.ualr.edu/index.shtml

As soon as it's listed here, he can start talking. He doesn't have to wait for the paper.

Good luck with your annoying glitches, Dy.