The boys are in their room tonight. Their real room. Their Forever Room. It's carpeted and clean. The closet has wood flooring. It's roomy. It's not right off the kitchen. ;-) The boys all helped move their belongings into the room. "Excited" doesn't begin to describe the atmosphere. Smidge and I sat on the floor, playing ball. James staked out his places in his bed and oriented himself in his space. John ran around in circles, making unintelligible yet happy noises. Zorak can't stop smiling.
The stencils were drawn up and cut out today, but not painted on. It's just not possible to paint ANYTHING with four small children and construction work going on. If Emily didn't need something, Smidge did. If one of the older boys wanted to do something, so did the other two. The constant hum of someone in search of something from somebody else created a distracting air that really killed the focus. Nobody had enough focus to L-I-S-T-E-N. So. Hopefully Zorak will take them far, far away tomorrow and I can stencil up trains, beakers, dragon footprints and dragon eggs while they are gone. (Don't ask me how I'm going to make it look nice - that's beyond me at this point. I just want them UP.) The ceiling fan blades have been painted and are drying. They'll go up tomorrow.
As soon as I post this entry, the computer gets shut off and we'll empty this bedroom to carpet it tomorrow.
My mind is turning now to the school room. It needs French doors and a bigger window, but for the immediate needs, it looks like new wiring and walls. It's exciting!
I'm strung a little taut at the moment. Mentally. Emotionally. Physically, I'm fine. But the other two are feeling a bit wrung out. Not sure how best to deal with that. Getting away isn't an option. Taking a break won't make things better. Slowing down won't, either. This is one of those times that require us to just plough through what needs to be done and try not to be too hard on ourselves for not seeing immediate joy in it. I liken it to hiking the switchbacks out of a deep canyon. The hike down was enjoyable, with new sights and discoveries. The stay, while often grueling, was pleasant and rewarding. Now it's time to hike back up. That always kills me. One foot in front of the other. Step.
Step.
Step.
Don't look at the top of the switchbacks. They seem insurmountable. But they aren't. You get there one plodding step at a time. Stop for water. Catch your breath. But don't think about how much of the climb is left. Just plug on. There's a thick steak and cold iced tea waiting for you up there, but you won't get closer by trying to see it from the trail. You have to keep. Going.
And I'm done with my water now. Time to put one foot in front of the other and take another step. The end of the trail may not be visible, but it's attainable, and the view from the top will be astounding! We just have to get up there to enjoy it.
Kiss those babies!
~Dy
12 comments:
I disagree.
You've just had a baby, and you *sound* like you barely paused in your routine. Slowing down *will* help. Feeling mentally and emotionally taught are your flashing light signs to step back and take it easier. Rest more. Snuggle more. You have *time* to finish the house, right?
Don't make me worry about you ;-)
Good analogy with the switchbacks, there! That's an encouraging word picture.
Although, part of me is thinking, "SWITCHbacks... reminds me a bit of sandWICH....hmmm...I'm hungry....."
Hang in there, though. When you're halfway back up, it's encouraging to look back to where you've started to see how far you've already come!
Now, I'm off to the kitchen....
I'll be holding a tall glass of fresh lemonade at the top for you! Don't worry,we all go through those teethclenching"step" times or at least I do! Courage! Marcella
Dy we all have those days. You have such a good attitude about it. Just give me a call if you need me to remind you that the resting spot is just around the bend. :-) Go visit a museum or sneak out with just Em to a cafe a night. Do something out of the ordinary, different from routine - that usually helps me. If all else fails, call me from a parking lot while you drive circles so Em stays asleep. ;-)
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I'm thinking of you, Dy.
Dy, I understand.
And I know you can't halt the house *work*, but Jess is right. (And I'm sure she's just tickled to death that she has the Queen's approval of her opinion. ROFL!) Do try to take a little time. Even if you just take the baby off to the library or something.
I'm so excited for your boys! The room sounds great! How are you bunking them?
We're going back and forth about our remodel plans...at least the bedrooms. 9 years between Eleanor and Lydia and 5 between Leo and John makes the one girls dorm/one boys dorm a bit unrealistic. *shrug* Kitchen first, anyway, and if you think YOUR entry was joyful...wait till you see MY blog when we get a dishwasher again. If I can figure out a way to have it shoot fireworks at every visitor, you can bet I will!
Don't overdo! That's an order! ;)
Dy-
I know very little of hiking, but your words not only helped me visualize the hiking but also the journey. Thank you for your inspiration. One step at a time, that's what I keep thinking to myself, one step at a time...
LisaMarie
How exciting that the boys are finally in their room. Yay!!! That's one down. And, like you said, it's not right off the kitchen. So, with that, I'm thinking you might actually get some mental preperation in the morning before they awake and your day begins, again.
You all have already accomplished so much! Be proud of that! I understand, at this point, that you just have to keep. pluggin'. along. Make sure you take little breaks along the way. Stop and reflect. Refresh your cup and your mind. Find the little joys in each day and that will help to pick yourself up. Keep going. I'm rootin' for you!!
I love the switchbacks analogy.
Well, from the distant perspective of someone who only knows you from your blog, I think you are progressing up the canyon at an astonishing pace! You only recently moved into your house, and have ripped out walls and windows, put in a new kitchen, doors, walls, floors, and given birth to a beautiful little girl. I am just in awe of all you are accomplishing, and you still find time for snugglings and outings with your children. I hope you feel that you can take a real break soon, to sit back and appreciate all you have recently done!
Cordially,
Melora
Ok, there was a point last spring where I really, really, really wanted to paint the living room because it was the Last Room I Needed to Paint. We had everything. Every bit of tape, brushes, roller covers, bucket of paint--everything.
Except there was nothing left of me. When push came to shove I started crying every time I thought that for sure I'd start on that room tonight.
So I didn't.
I still have it all--all the paint and brushes and whatnot. I'm confident that one Saturday this spring/summer I'll wake up and make the whole family think I'm nuts by moving all the furniture in there away from the walls and finally Gettting It Done.
I guess I'm just saying I agree with Stephanie. And while I *do* know that 99% of the craziness last year was worth it, I also remember that about halfway through it I got sicker than I have ever, ever, ever been as an adult and I just don't want that happening to you (dude, my ear HUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRT).
I truly KNOW that "where there's a will, there's a way," but some days it's God telling you to SLOW DOWN and the smack-down that results when you shrug that off and say, "No, no, I am She-Ra, Woman of Power!" is just not pretty.
((Dy)) To quote one of my favorie lines, from a classic in it's own right, Finding Nemo:
Just keep swimming. Swimming, swimming. Just keep swimming. Tra-la-la-la-la-la!
:-) Hang in there. A Forever Home wasn't built in a day and neither is a Forever Life. Keep stepping!!
Oh Dy. I read your blog this morning and then had to step away from the computer. While I was going about my daily business, you kept popping into my head and I would say a little prayer for you. But the one thing that also kept popping into my head was this, "She did just have a baby."
Please give yourself a little time to adjust to having four instead of three. Go easy on yourself and take a break if need be. Just keep plugging away and eventually it will all be as it should. Remember there is no timetable for anything except your children because they grow up too fast.
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