Wednesday, September 27

Not Dissin' The Honey

Evidently, I need to clarify: Zorak is not a goof, nor is he incompetent. I wasn't dissing him in the bicycle post. Honest. He's awesome, and he does amazing things, and he constantly astounds me with, not only his skills and abilities, but his gentle nature and deep affection for others.

That post was all about how *I* am a total loser when it comes to bikes. All on me, there. And the thing was left partially assembled simply because, well, when you have to leave the house that stinkin' early, midnight is a mighty rough time to be doing assembly work. (That was the cause for my Skeptical Look - he's talented and kind, but not so much with the time estimates for projects. *grin*)

Anyhow, I got the rest of the thing done, except for the rear brakes, which I worked on rather diligently, with only minor cursing and the occasional foray back into the kitchen for more coffee. Finally, I had to admit defeat and wait for Zorak. He walked in and, with a few quick moves, had the brakes attached and adjusted to perfection. We stood there, we two. He, staring at the happy boy, me, staring at the Hubby. "How'd you do that?" I asked. He chuckled, "Did you forget about all the kids in Maryland?"

And that's when I remembered, or rather, that's when it clicked with me. There were a large number of kids in our neighborhood in Maryland who just didn't have an adult in their lives to tend to the peripherals. Wonderful Neighbor Wife and I tended to the little ones, providing adult supervision and a safe place to play, as well as constructive activity to discourage their previous activities. We made available the sidewalk chalk, jump ropes, water play, a secure place to toodle around on their bikes and trikes. We packed extra food for the front yard picnics.

Zorak, meanwhile, became the Go-To guy for all the adolescent and pre-adolescent young men in the area. He helped them with their equipment, and with their bikes. It started out simply enough, with a request to use our foot pump to air up a tire. But it soon morphed into an informal mentoring relationship. The boys hung out more in our portion of the neighborhood, waiting for his assistance and a chance to learn. He encouraged them in his natural, gentle way. He made himself available. They began interacting with the other neighbors as they worked in the front yard, and became part of the community. Bit by bit, he amassed all the necessary equipment to make repairs and do maintenance - brakes, pads, calipers, tubes, pumps, etc. He taught the kids how to take care of their things, how to make adjustments, do maintenance, what to look for and where to find answers. It was awesome, and the kids were awesome. When we left, he gifted the boys with all of the supplies he'd purchased during our time there, and we hope that the things they learned will stick with them as much as the things we learned have.

It's all connected, isn't it? Being kind and helpful to someone may just feel like the right thing to do, and your goal may be to help somebody out and make a difference. But it's a bonus to look back and see that there's been a difference made in you, along the way, as well.

And, while Zorak is impressing me with his vast array of somewhat obscure knowledge, I did not know you can grow a loofah! I also did not know you can eat them. He did, and has. And from now on, I promise not to be surprised by the wonderful things I'm bound to continue discovering about this man. :-)

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

6 comments:

Kathy Jo DeVore said...

But will he eat a grasshopper? :) And yes, Ernie has. That's the story he likes to tell at dinner to people we don't know very well. It's a sense of humor test, and you'd be amazed at how many people fail it. :}

Anonymous said...

Just so you know, I didn't think you were 'dissing your hubby. He just sounded like a man with a full schedule. Like my man, who says he's going to make bunkbeds for the children before baby is born in five months, and I can't help but raise a skeptical eyebrow myself and wonder, "When?!" The next two months are packed with field time, into which he's also trying to cram a camping trip and a family lets-get-a-chainsaw-and-cut-our-own-firewood trip.

Your Zorak sounds like a particularly good man (though maybe not quite as good as my David). That's one of the things I love about you...you love your husband.

Ernest said...

I wouldn't mind being the go-to guy for neighborhood youth. I like kids, really, for the most part.

Unfortunately somehow I turned into "scary guy" instead.

Dy said...

Oh, KathyJo, I know. When Zorak and I were first dating, and he'd introduce me to somebody and they'd ask where we met, he'd say, "In jail." And then not expound any further.

The first time he did it, I spit my drink all over the table. Then I got the hang of him, and it really was kind of fun to watch them try to figure out which of us was in jail at the time... :-)

Jennie, yes, he does have a full schedule, and there is so much he wants to do - for me, for the kids, for our home - but only so many hours in a day. Add to it that whole sole provider thing, and, well, we have The Skeptical Look. (The bed Zorak built didn't make it before the baby was born, either.) But I do love him, and thankfully, he loves us, too. :-)

Psst, Ernie - chasing kids down the street in the middle of the night sometimes has that effect. *grin* I wish you guys lived closer, though, b/c we'd love to have you as neighbors.

Dy

Emily (Laundry and Lullabies) said...

So, did you guys REALLY meet in jail? Or maybe that was just his "humor test"? Tell, please! :)

Zorak sounds like a really wonderful guy. How neat to be the neighborhood mentor!

Kathy Jo DeVore said...

Ernie's never done that one before. But, once in a store when I handed the cashier my check card, he asked, "What name is on that one?" We almost didn't get out of there with our groceries. And the infamous time when he explained Joshua's blonde hair by pointing out that he travels a lot.

I think Ernie and Zorak would get along famously. :D