Before and After

(Edited to add: photo glitches have been fixed!)

Main shots, Balcony O' Death...

After the destruction...

As of this evening...

The nasty, gaping holes have been filled. The balcony is taking shape...

Yay.

I've posted three separate posts in order to accomodate Blogger's cap on uploading images per post, so if you'd like to see more, scroll down. The previous two posts have all the fun details for ya!

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

Balcony O' Death: Reconstruction

Here, you can see John starting to work on the stairs beneath the door that's been wired shut ever since we quit throwing old cabinetry out of it. The bricks that have already come off are now backfill for the driveway. The rest will come off shortly, and will probably be... backfill... for the rest of the driveway. (It's a long driveway.)

And here is the main framing for the deck that will allow us to unwire the door of death. It will be the door of death no more. Yay!

You can see here how this deck wraps around toward the front, as an extension of the balcony o' not death (still working on a new name for it).

Below, we have piers, glorious piers!

And here, we have glorious piers holding glorious posts. (And, by the way, we are a notoriously messy construction crew. We'll clean up when we're done. Or when we can't find our tools anymore. Please excuse the mess.)

Ta-da!

Details and Tidbits

OK, this is the fun stuff. Kind of. Mostly just fun for us, but you get to watch. Think of it as our version of a vacation slideshow.

This is a close-up of one of the concrete piers. Zorak made the forms. The boys mixed the concrete (about three tons of gravel, two tons of sand, and a whole lot of portland cement - 3-2-1, scoop-and-mix!) Smidge did the tapping. Fun for the whole family! We like the octagonal shape - the corners aren't as likely to chip, and they look really cool when you stand back and take in the whole thing. We didn't use round forms because one day we plan to put in a rock knee wall beneath the balcony to create a sun-room off the basement. The wide, flat sides of this design give us a surface against which to build the wall. (They're the same width as concrete blocks.)

Here you see a regular, plain old ledger board bolted to the house (all the way through to the interior of the basement, not just into the bricks - we've seen pictures of how that goes, and it does not go well. So, nice and secure. Yay.) The beam leaning against the wall shows the jointing (made that word up - expect to hear it in construction circles next season - we're cool that way) for the balcony. Stay with me, it'll make sense in a minute.

Close-up of the notches for the beams, boards, and other woody stuffs. These serve to provide additional strength and support to reduce the risk of hard failure (screws shearing off, nails pulling out, and other nasty gravitationally instigated mishaps). Kinda looks like Lincoln Logs meets Jenga, doesn't it? Zorak had way too much fun with this, I can tell you that.

And this is how it all goes together. Zorak is hanging one part of the cantilever beam on the outside notch of the picture you just saw (another board goes on the inside, and then there is a board between the two, so the cantilever beam is three layers thick). You can see on the right hand side, at the corner of the house, where the first notched beam is now bolted to the ledger board, and how the ledger board sits inside the notch, on a ledge of its own. It's a sort of ledge-within-a-ledge schematic. All of the posts along the wall are secured to the concrete piers with base posts, to the house with anchor bolts, and to the ledger (which is also secured to the house). A tornado may take down the house, but this balcony and, the wall it's attatched to, will remain standing.

How do you move a 9' tall 6x6 beam 1/8" to plumb? You break out the Animaniacs tools! This is actually the sledge-o-matic for squashing aluminum cans, but we found it works great for making minute adjustments to the beams without marring the surface. We call it the tweak-o-matic, now. Again, look for this term to surface among all the cool DIY-ers this season.

The End of Season Party

We made it. On time, even. Yay, us! The baseball cupcakes were a big hit.

Turns out, they don't photograph well. We ran out of red part of the way through decorating (I know, I know! I thought I had two tubes!), and had to hit three different stores to find more. What we found was a different brand, and had a softer, shinier texture to it. I don't like the way it makes the short stitches. But the kids didn't seem to mind, so that was nice.

In lieu of pouring something wet and sticky on the coach, the coach's wife bought silly string for the kids to douse him with. He took it with such good humor, and, as you can see, the kids absolutely loved it!

Jase hung out a little, passed a lot of gas, and then passed out cold for one of the moms on the team. He was so relaxed, and so deeply asleep, we began to wonder if he'd been drugged...

But, no. He awoke shortly and finished the afternoon playing peek-a-boo with the boys on the team. (Eight year old kids are so cool, you know that? Even they can't resist the lure of making a baby smile. Stuff like that rejuvenates my hope for mankind. It really does.)

And hey, the lumber for the balcony is *scheduled for delivery*!! Tomorrow! It's paid for. They know where we live, and what we need. Wee-ha, it's coming together!

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

A Quiet Thursday

I haven't been taking many pictures lately, at all. You're not missing much. We've all been so busy with domestic tasks, and shots of the kids picking up the living room, while perhaps inspiring, aren't that interesting. Or cute. Trust me. I liked this one, from Tuesday's game. Those little eyebrows are so expressive.

Today is a Quiet Thursday. The boys have piano, and that's it. That's all. Can you believe it? No games, no Scouts, no nuthin'. Sweet, sweet slow-down!

We have grass! Less than a week after we put the seed and mulch down, we have little plugs of grass sprouting up through the straw. I can't believe it survived the party. Very exciting. We've dubbed it the Chia Lawn.

We re-hung the birdfeeder after the squirrels chewed through the cord that held it up. Zorak and James made a very cool Squirrel Guard and installed that above the feeder to keep the squirrels out of it, but I think it's scaring the birds, too. They haven't come to it since we re-hung it.

Zorak said he thinks he's ready to schedule a lumber delivery for the balcony-that-may-one-day-be. He might. We may work on it this week. I don't know. I don't think I'm going to say anything certain until I see the wood being unloaded in the lower drive. After a while, one starts to doubt one's own sanity when going back and re-reading all the times one wrote, "This week we'll..." or "Today we're going to..." and realizing that one's prediction rate is a whopping 8%. OK, I'm assuming we all already knew I wasn't a prophet, right? So we're good on that one? Very well, then.

And that's about all the news that's fit to print this morning (I hate morning-blogging - my brain isn't up yet).
Kiss those babies!
~Dy

So Busy!

I have something Very Exciting to share! But I don't want to blow it just yet by saying anything without posting pictures. This is killing me. (No, we aren't pregnant, and nothing identifiable is actually growing in the garden.) Maybe I can pick up the construction debris enough to post pictures soon? (It's not a finished balcony, either - the rain didn't stop until last night!)

We've worked and worked and worked... and worked. Today we drive and drive and drive. Dentist appointment for me. Piano for the boys. Tournament games for all three kids. Plus, groceries and general planning/cleaning to do.

We get to rent-a-kid on Friday! Well, actually, it's another homeschooling mom who is loaning out her teenager for manual labor over the summer. :-) He's a very sweet boy to agree to come help, and it'll be a serious blessing to have those extra hands. He's a huge help to his mom, but they don't have any manly-man jobs left to do on their house, and she'd like him to have some experience in that realm. Definitely a win-win for everyone: he gets experience, we get help, and she knows he's with people who aren't going to use the Slave Trader method of motivation on her son. I hope we can find people to help work the boys if we're out of things for them to do when they're teenagers.

That said, I've got about half an hour to do some sewing before I need to start making phone calls. Have a great day!

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

Sillcocks

Here's a sillcock. This one has all the goodies in ours: anti-siphon, freeze proof, metal ears. It's one of those things you just don't give much thought to, until it leaks, or breaks, or... you don't have one.

Life. Is. Good.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

Mmm-mmm, good.

We accomplished so much today. It was fantastic. But my favorite parts of the weekend had nothing to do with progress, or preparation, or anything on our To-Do List. My favorite parts were, as photographed...
* listening to James play the recorder as he sat cross-legged on the bumper buddy...
* watching John rig a contraption for carrying the bucket as he collected pine cones (Zorak and I agree that while he would do just fine on a deserted island, he's enjoy it way too much and douse the fire anytime he heard a plane -- we'd never hear from him again)...
* gardening with EmBaby, and wondering how it is that toddlers can beat the odds and get those little shoes on the wrong feet, every. single. time. But oh, what precious little backward feet...
* looking at Smidge and realizing he's just not much of a Smidge anymore -- he's growing up fast...

This is why we do it, you know. I need to print this photo collage out and tape a copy up in every room, for those times I can't quite wrap my mind around why we're doing this. I just need to remember that I won't find the answer on any list. I have to look around to really see the A-list priorities.

Of course, that said, we worked 'em like black-market child labor all weekend. :-) The upper meadow is mowed and de-limbed. The entire front yard is seeded and mulched. There are five happy little hostas planted in front of the porch. We dismantled the old stringers, removed another good chunk of the brick steps, gathered the bricks and cement debris from the sidewalk we'd pulled up, and took them down to begin filling the driveway holes and building up where the creek had washed away a good five feet of drive over the culvert. We tidied up the construction zone, gathered wood and kindling for a bonfire, and worked in the garden.

Zorak installed not one, but two, sillcocks at the upper end of the house -- one for the front yard and garden areas, one for the back yard. WOOHOO! (That one is almost as exciting to me as the day we got indoor plumbing!)

I finally made it to the fabric store for muslin, the missing key component in the reupholstery project that is destined to make Brand New Furniture sound like a great idea the next time something goes to pot around here, and velcro.

Then, the kids feasted on Otter Pops and played. Zorak and I are going to collapse.

Five days til the birthday bbq. Still trying to line up a bush hog. Need to firm up rental reservations tomorrow. Need to start the shopping list, and buy a grill. Oh, and finish that couch.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

The Awesome Saturday

We got up, fed the kids, spot-cleaned uniforms (the boys wore their jerseys to Smidge's party - it made him feel very proud, and I think the big boys got a kick out of it, too. But, of course, they got mustard, ketchup, and grass stains all over them.) AND out the door for a 9:00 game! WOOHOO!!

WE ROCK!!

The field, glistening in the morning dew (or maybe that was just the glow of being on time?)...

was totally empty...

wha--?

I called the coaches. Turns out, there are no games this weekend. There was enough uproar that they moved all the games. Huh. Well, cool. It's nine o'clock, and we're up, awake, and ready to tackle... um... something else.

Zorak finished the lumber bids. He put up a post or two. He would have accomplished more if the rest of us didn't keep needing his help.

I tilled the front yard. By the time we're done with the tilling, I should have shoulders and forearms that would shame the old East German swim team! Yeah, that's a sexy look for summer. Until then, however, I'm so not there, yet. Zorak had to restart it for me, every time. At one point, I wanted to throw an old-fashioned temper tantrum because I. Cannot. get this thing to start. Makes me feel so helpless, and I hate it. Fortunately, he doesn't complain about having to stop what he's doing to come help me. He always says, "It's tricky" - which is probably a lie - then he smiles and winks at me and sometimes gives me a kiss. That takes some of the sting out of it.

John helped me plant the hostas. Smidge and Emily drowned them. I think we should have put water lilies there. We found some more hostas in the sloped yard, and since there isn't enough sun, they aren't very big, so I think we're going to move those today up to the foundation area.

John moved all the limbs out of the back yard. He tossed bricks out of the back yard. He dumped cement into the driveway. He helped tidy the house. That child is a Work Horse of the First Order. He's amazing when he puts on his game face.

James took care of JT most of the day - having him around is like having Super Nanny - he's fantastic. He finally got the baby settled on the porch with his bouncy seat, where he happily hung out talking to spider webs and hummingbirds for the rest of the afternoon. When James wasn't busy with the baby, he gathered all the pine cones from the yard for the bonfire next week, and kept busy doing tidy work on the garden bed and the rest of the meadow.

We took on the poison ivy. We won't win, but we can hold it at bay while the company is here.

We put grass seed down on a quarter of the lawn, and mulched it with straw. I've got to get pictures of that process today. Oh, my word, the kids are SO cute spreading the straw! James and John may not be big, but they can manhandle a bale with gusto. One flake is as big as EmBaby, and she feels SO BIG helping to spread it around. If I hadn't been afraid my shoulders would seize up and refuse to move, I'd have stopped working to just watch them do their thing.

We took a break to check our fruits. As we walked past one tree, I told Zorak, "I swear, that tree looks like it should BE something." He stopped, stared, and said, "Um, it is!" Hey, whaddya know! We've got another fruiting tree! It looks like it's a pear, although a different variety than *the* pear tree we've been working on all this time. How. Cool. The count is now up: two apples, two pears, one peach. It's like Christmas in May!

Can't wait to see what we accomplish and find today!

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

No Title Today

Can't think of one. However, is there anything more relaxing than a canopy of Dogwood leaves?Saw the periodontist yesterday. He said the underlying tooth is surprisingly intact, structurally, and thinks a new crown can be reset on it. He referred me to a new dentist when I expressed my concerns with the one who had originally referred me to the perio. (The upside of getting a dental referral from a periodontist is that he sees the work of all the dentists around, and can steer you in a direction that may fit well with your needs! I *really* hope this pans out!) I showed him the concrete-like slab my last dentist put in, and he said this new guy does fantastic restorative work. Say a prayer, please? I go in today at 1:30.

I've accomplished diddly-squat around here, lately, other than treading water and barely keeping up with feeding and cleaning. This weekend, I'm locking the children outside with little satchels of snacks, bottles of water, and a GPS so that I can finish up:

* the couch (the book I mentioned last week did seem to help, at least with pointing out what an idiot I am, and where I've gone wrong thus far - so, that's good),

* the covers for the barstools (my initial plan hasn't worked so well - they're a PITB to get off to wash, and so, they don't get washed -- ew),

* hopefully the new curtains for our room (because the current blankets-on-nails motif is just soooo early "Broke Undergrad"),

* and curtain trim for EmBaby's room (she's had Thomas curtains this whole time -- not imperative to correct, but would be nice, I'm sure).

Hopefully, we can also borrow a tiller and get some seed planted, as well as put the two little hostas in the ground before they go into total shock and die back completely. I still have to go talk to the neighbors about keeping their chickens in check for a couple of weeks, so the seeds (both lawn and garden) can take root instead of becoming chicken feed. Not looking forward to that, but I think I've just made it bigger in my head than it needs to be. I *will* suck it up and take care of that before Saturday. (Hold me accountable!)

And, as you can see, Smidge is still into both baseball, and posing for pictures (he actually scrambled to get his glove when he saw me stalking him with the camera!)...

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

Conversations and Tidbits

James: Will aphids bite?

Me: No, they're just irritating.

James: Oh. Ok-- uh, irritating, as in annoying? Or irritating as in, they will irritate your skin?

Me: Just annoying.

James: Well, that's good!

****************************************************

We have decorative ivy climbing the new fence! It's pretty cool.
We have poison ivy climbing everything else. Not so cool.
We found earthworms.
We found fire ants.
We found a butterfly.
We found grubby, leggy, swarmy things. (I think it was a disturbed ant bed.)
So, in general, we're not making fantastic headway out there.
But it's not all bad, either.
But I am seriously done with the Mary Poppins attitude to landscaping today.

*****************************************************

James: I found a swarm of something in one of the bricks. They look like maggots, with legs. Like this. (Makes legs with his fingers sticking from his abdomen.) Can I touch it?

Me: (It's only 12:26, and I am SO done doing the yardwork-with-kids thing already.) Honey, if you find a brick swarming with anything, just leave it be.

James: (Not looking at me...) Like that?

Me: What?

James: Like that.

Me: Like... what?

James: Like that bee? (Points at a hovering bee on the porch.)

*sigh*

******************************************************

EmBaby: Em 'a want 'a swing!

Me: (There's an empty swing right in front of her.) Well, ok, go swing.

EmBaby: Em 'a want 'a THAT swing. (The one her brother is in, of course.)

Me: Well, that one's in use, Baby. You can pick one of the other swings...

EmBaby: *bursts into tears*

Me: Well, Love, a fit won't get you what you want. If you need to throw this fit, you can do it in your room. If you want to swing, you need to stop with the fit.

EmBaby: *sniff* *sniff* OK. I all done. *sniff* Em 'a want 'a swing.

(What's the computer code for an endless loop? Yeah, insert that right about... here.)

************************************************

And the general MO of the day: don't think about what you do before you do it.

EmBaby comes to me, crying that John bonked her in the head with a dirt clod.

Gah. We have discussed this, I don't know how many times. We. Do. Not. Throw. Dirt. Period. (But particularly not at people.)

Me: JOHN! Did you throw dirt clods?

John: (in his most humble, I really don't want to be telling the truth right now, voice) Yes.

Me: Don't we have some kind of guideline about that?

John: Don't do it.

James: Um, Mom. I was part of that. You know how when you throw dirt clods and they come apart due to the... something-something... friction and gravity... mumble-something... time-space continuum... average PSI... inhalation... (OK, I wasn't paying attention - his explanations get overly involved and unnecessarily exhausting. I've taken to standing there, looking stern until his lips stop moving and he makes eye contact again. So shoot me. But I did give him immediate credit for 'fessing up to his part in it before I even had to ask.)

Basically, they were playing some kind of game wherein James rides his bike and John tries to hit him with dirt clods as he goes by. Aside from the fact that I think that's a weird thing to play, I have other problems with it. The thing about moving targets, of course, being that they often bring into the line of fire non-moving, non-targets. And when you're seven, it's not like your aim is the greatest.

So, I ran through my mental parenting rubric:

Told the truth the first time, +5 pts.
...without me reminding him of the importance of doing so. +10 pts.
Spotted the error in their thinking process, +3 pts.
...without me having to point it out. +10 pts.
Sibling coughed up a truthful inclusion confession on his own, +20 pts.
Both parties showed concern (ok, some awareness) that their actions, however unintentional, had negatively affected someone else. +50 pts. (been workin' on that one for a while!)

So it's not 100% (that would be reserved for "thought things through before doing them" - it will be a Very Happy Day when that happens!) But it's not bad for a 7yo and a 9yo. I couldn't really justify leaping into Lecture Land. They handled it well. I'm proud of them.

But I'm still done doing the yardwork-with-kids thing. :-P

That's why I'm in here, blogging, under the pretext of figuring out what to fix for lunch.

ONE PIER!

That's all that's left to pour! There's one support post up, and Zorak plans to hit Lowe's on the way home tomorrow for ledger board/band board, and columns! WOOT!!

I wish my progress was as exciting. It wasn't. We sifted the closets. Had the boys try on *everything* in there. Took out the winter garb, put it in a pile. Took out things that don't fit, put them in a pile. Set aside the things that are not in good repair any longer, put 'em in a pile. Took out things they just don't wear, put those... in a bag. (The piles were starting to irritate all of us at that point.) The clutter sneaks up on me, season after season. Thank heaven for Spring Cleaning, no?

Smidge, EmBaby and I went to the feed store to see about buying a Croton (thanks, Melora - that's just what it was!!), but they don't have a supplier for them. We'll have to go back to the fruit stand for those. We bought two hostas, instead, and they're sitting out front, waiting for to the muse to move and show Zorak and I where, exactly, to put the holes.

Saturday was a whirlwind of activity and stoopid Home Depot employees. But it was a good day, other than that. So, all-in-all, all is well. I'm just too pooped to write tonight, and have too many thoughts bumping into each other to make any of them make sense individually.

A Lovely Day and Big Plans

Well, BabyJ kept me up until about five this morning. I think Zorak had intended to let me sleep in a bit, but the boys were anxious to fix me breakfast in bed for Mother's Day. Had I not been (a) still mostly asleep, and (b) nursing the wee one, when they made their grand entrance (setting the plate on the wee babe, since that was closest to my head, I suppose), I'm sure my gratitude would have been more clearly evident than with my groggy, utterances of, "oh. OH! Oh, um, oh" It was all I could come up with. When they brought in the coffee, I got really nervous, pried myself loose and joined everyone for breakfast at the table.

By the time we'd eaten (and I was a bit more alert, erm, coherent), we decided today should be a work day. Zorak, John and Smidge worked on the balcony piers. I worked in the basement. James watched Jason and Em for me. We talked. We worked. We planned. It's not your typical Mother's Day dream plan, but it's so very "us". Yes, we're geeks. We know this. We embrace it. It's what makes it all work, you know.

Zorak managed to avoid having to discuss his birthday plans with me just long enough that I hit that stage where my voice cracks and my right eye twitches involuntarily. I'd written on my calendar that invitations were to go out Monday. TOMORROW. And here, we didn't even have a menu, or a theme, or a balcony! He took pity on me and nailed down a few details. Invitations won't go out tomorrow, but we have a theme, a menu, and he's promised me a list of names from work by tomorrow evening.

We may, or may not, have a balcony in time. We've decided we're not sweating it. However, since I evidently only work well under incredible pressure with unreasonable expectations, my insane inner self decided that I need to have the basement party-presentable "just in case" the weather is bad.

Right.

Because a tent in the meadow somehow provides less shelter than an open-air balcony.

I know. I don't get it, either. It's a wacky world inside this head. But I seldom get bored. So, there's that.

It's about time for a curriculum and scheduling post, too! I just have to stop hyperventilating over the cost of the new curriculum, first. It'll come.

And now, in case that little bundle of late-night energy decides to wake up and party, I'm going to get some shut-eye, myself.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

Outings

(Heh. Had to type that title three times. I kept typing "poutings".)

So, Zorak and I have initiated Project Forward Motion. There's too much that needs to be done aside from the balcony. The balcony is not being as cooperative as it ought to have been, and so, not much else has been done. That needs to stop. The lower meadow and barn areas look like staging for Jurassic Park. The garden beds are more like low-budget miniatures for the aerial scenes. Ew.

The kids and I put the bumper buddy on the Suburban and headed down to the local feed shop. I love this place. Their prices are reasonable. Their staff is helpful. They have fantastic wooden chairs and benches out front. And they have moonpies, which, rumor has it, if the kids ingest enough of those before they turn 18, will bestow upon the children magic "from here" status. Yesiree, gotta love the local feed shop.

We bought five fly strips (I know, ew, but the flies have been horrible this week, and if we've got to look at them, we'd rather they be imobile), some grass seed (in bulk, how cool do I feel now? To keep the clover at bay near the house so James doesn't puff up like a bloodshot Michelin Man), three bales of wheat straw (for mulch), a gazillion packets of seeds for the salad bed (plus sunflowers for the sunflower house, and a stray packet of random flowers because Smidge said he wanted to grow them for me, and that just totally melted my little stressed-out, grinch-like heart). Oh, and I reserved a watering trough. Heh. Now I feel very cool, indeed. Of course, it's mostly just for washing the dog, right now. But someday we'll have something that will want to drink out of it, and then we'll have it.

We came home, mowed the upper meadow, weeded the salad bed, and then headed out to the fields. James had practice. Smidge had a game. I skipped James' practice in order to watch Smidge's game. Oh, how *cute* are 20 four-year-olds scampering around after the World's Slowest Moving Ball? Throw in the little matching outfits, and it's like watching dress rehearsals for a Dick Van Dyke musical. Simply fantastic. Another win. More nax. Then we hung out at the park for half an hour and let them run in circles and use their outside voices.

John, who is tumbling headlong into Young Man-Hood, leapt from the car before I had the keys out, and worked on the upper meadow some more. Wow. That lawnmower is still almost as big as he is, and yet he gets on it and gets the job done. Zorak made awesome salmon patties, and then we all crashed. Hard. As a matter of fact, the typos are only getting worse and more difficult to spot, so I'm going to stop now. But thank you for your encouraging words this morning. I can't tell you how glad I am to know that 1) the kids won't remember, 2) I'm not the only one, 3) this, too, shall pass. You're the best, you know that?

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

Good news and Bad news

The good news is that, after two and a half years, we finally figured out where the leach lines are for the septic system!

More good news is that we've got three holes dug for the footers and piers, and are ready to pour concrete.

The bad news is...

that the leach lines are...

right where the piers go.

Gah.

I'll go kiss my babies as soon as I've washed my hands. *shudder*
~Dy

Balcony O' Death Pictures

OK, so the Forever Home has what may have been, at one point, a lovely balcony. It is not now, as you can see. But the issues weren't simply aesthetic. Not something you could slap a little Cabot stain on and call it good. Let me show you a few highlights...

Well, first, we have the security features... compliments of Georgia Pacific. This came with the house when we bought it. The basic dimensions of the balcony are 12'x27'. It's large and spacious. It also swayed a good 8" at the top level if you walked on it. When you're ten feet up, with no net to catch you, that's a bad thing. Note the spacing between pickets. Smidge and Em could both fit through there, side-by-side. Great, tandem toddler tossing. Not such a selling point, we know.

The columns holding up the deck are 4x4's. 15' tall 4x4 beams, set way too far apart to support the structure. *sigh* They are set in concrete piers, which is good. But the concrete is below grade (aka - buried in moist dirt) on every one of them, which is, well, useless. So, naturally, every column is rotted to the core and ready to shear off in a high wind, or if someone actually leans on one of them at just the right angle. Weee!

Here, you can see a better view of the toddler take-off points. Yes, paneling. Lovely, no? (NO. But, better than losing a child or two. We only joke about some of them being spares.) The deck boards are 1/2" boards. This is not so great. It transitions to Very Bad after 30-some-odd years with no protective measures to compensate. Some of the boards don't even make it all the way onto the joists. Nothing says "Better videotape this for Jackass" quite like watching the decking bow beneath your feet. Don't do this if you build a deck, okay? Thicker boards don't cost that much more, and they are well worth the investment. Thanks.

Ooooo, this is one of my favorites shots! Not only were my knees tingly the whole time (which made it hard to focus on composition, okay?), but it shows a little more detail of the craftsmanship in our balcony. What you see here is a 12' span supported by 2"x8" joists! Does the fun never stop? Did these people just hate their friends and hope for a spectacular flaming death at a Fourth of July BBQ? Why? Why did they do this? (General rule of thumb: 2x8 - 8' span, 2x10 - 10' span, 2x12 - 12' span... we're runnin' a wee bit shy on the spinal supports, here. The rotted, puny support columns were also spaced way too far apart, so it's not like there was any help on that side, either.)

And here, it's down. Love the ghetto action look, don't you? (I keep reminding myself that things often look worse before they look better.) Note the lovely ginormous holes in the brick. They're huge - three bricks high by 3/4 of a brick wide. They knocked those out to put in the bolts to support the ledger board. And while I do appreciate that the ledger board was actually bolted TO the house, I just don't understand the need to leave such enormous holes. It's a theme with these people. We've spent more on mortar patch and expanding foam than we have on flooring. We suspect this may be one area where the various snakes, lizards, squirrels, and other critters-that-ought-not-be-indoors entered the house.

Let's not even discuss the discoloration... you know what that is. We don't need to say it. *shudder*

Now, the overall plan is to put up a new deck using 6x6 colums set in piers that will remain above grade, with wet-set anchor bolts and galvanized fasteners and all that good stuff. (Because we like our children and our friends, and have no desire to recreate the Titanic on land, thanks.) We're moving the columns in two feet, with a two-foot cantilever (which is totally not scary or dangerous) so we can retain the 12' depth of the deck and not have to use 2x12 joists (because, let's face it, we only have so much money, and most of it goes to food and library late fees). We're extending the steps out another couple of feet so that each step isn't a full 11" high. (If I need a cardio-step workout, I can just walk from the barn to the house, anyway.) You won't even be able to stuff a newborn between the pickets on the new railings.

AND, we're wrapping the deck around the back so that the kitchen-door-that-we-cannot-use can finally be unwired and used without fear of bodily injury. We've always wanted a wrap-around deck. *smile* And since we've got the back yard fenced in, now, we've also wanted a way to get into the back yard that doesn't involve traipsing through our bedroom. This will meet both needs beautifully. And, that's what we've been up to!

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

The Balcony O' Death

*breathe in* *breathe out*

This is my new plan. I'm going to stick to it, no matter how hard it (or parts of it) may be. Remind me of this over the next month, will ya?

Today, Zorak began work on the preliminary portion of the balcony demolition, erm, rehabilitation. OK, no, demolition is the correct term. We were going to just shore it up a bit, make reinforcements here and there, and try to do this with as little expense as possible. Unfortunately, the closer we looked, the wider we realized the gap is between "possible" and... well, we pretty much had to redefine "possible" just to get started. Every. Little. Thing. Needs to be yanked and re-done. So, that's what we're going to do.

First, we banished the children to the Upper Meadow and the Back Yard. Only. Ever. Under penalty of having to live in the Scary Room until this project is completed if they so much as set a foot in the lower portion of the drive, or anywhere near the balcony. Obviously, they happily obliged.

We (the Royal We - I stayed inside and hummed loudly to myself - Zorak did all the work and the scary stuff) started with removing a limb that's been threatening to increase our insurance premiums ever since we bought the place.

The limb starts out from the tree about 20' off the ground, and extends straight up and out, extending over the balcony for a good 15'-20', ending in a gangly mass of dead weight, just waiting for a tornado, a heavy rain, or possibly just more than two migratory birds at one time to land on it. Zorak climbed up on the roof and started by removing the smaller pieces. Since the balcony is coming down, we didn't have to sweat it out any longer as to whether it would survive another limb-dive.

It mostly did. The hole on the left is from the first limb-dive, oh, a little over a year or so ago. The hole on the right is from the impact of the branch you see lying there. The balcony, itself, however, although now significantly more reminiscent of a foundering-ship-at-sea, did not collapse. So, armed with fresh determination, and an unyielding belief that I'd remember to call 9-1-1 if something horrible happened, Zorak took off a huge portion of the remaining limb. This is what it looks like, now. (Standing at the far, far end of the balcony, looking up.)

And this, is where the limb landed. I should have had Zorak go stand by it, to give you some perspective. Hmmm, perhaps I can use the debris to help? The camera is a good fifteen feet up, and 12 feet back. Those are five gal. buckets, there to the left of it. Cinder blocks comprise the two grey squares between the limb and the balcony. I'd guess the limb is a good 8" diameter where it broke off.

And so, the first of the many puckering phases of this project is complete. The rest of the limb looks solid, and should clear the balcony easily. It will come down this week. And then, so will the balcony. And then, the New Balcony, the one that will not shimmy, shake, or make anybody seasick, will rise from the rubble like a... like a non-flaming, not terribly magical Phoenix. Yup. That pretty much sums it up.

Tomorrow, more pictures, and I'll highlight some of the Hideous Contracting Decisions that make this deck oh, so special. But for now, BabyJ is up and so is my blogging time.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

Beauty is...

Definitely in the eye of the beholder.

This is the ex-Zen waterfall back in the Scary Room. The tar paper funnel? Unnecessary now. (Well, and partially useless to begin with, but that's what we had at the time.) There is a bit of dampness (Amy, I won't use the "m" word in this post, just because you're still recovering and I adore you - but it is "m" down there.) What there is not, however, is actual FLOW, conveyance, or white water rapids.

It rained harder last night than it has in over a year. The creek nearly flooded. There is debris along the edge of the drive, it came up that high. Zorak actually called to ask that I keep the kids away from the creek today because it was so full and moving so quickly. That's a LOT. Of. Rain, folks.

Until now, this basement has flooded in the kind of light rains that Bert and Mary Poppins dance in. Normally, you can hear the water flowing when you go into the basement. This morning? Silence. Sweet, semi-dry silence. And after I screwed up the courage to open the door and look I was quite delighted to find it THIS dry. Also, up top, there are usually small pools (filled with some kind of aquatic life, I'm sure, something like Smeagol), but as far as I could tell - not that I scampered up that embankment - there aren't any!

And all we did (well, all Zorak did - I stood there and pretended to be able to eyeball the slope) was the dirt work from the last couple of weekends! WOOHOO!

So, now...

A french drain...

Some foliage...

It'll soon be dry and snug under there. (Not that I'll want to hang out in it, even then, but, you know, it'll be progress.)

And yes, it's still an ugly room. But that nearly dry corner? Beautiful!

~Dy

*for the record, Zorak objects to the use of the phrase "screwed up the courage" - he says it sounds like I messed it up somehow. But you know, I really, truly didn't want to open that door, and I can't think of a better way to phrase it!*

Dirty Work... (Forever Home Update)

This is the view from the edge of the upper meadow. Thanks to the pesky law of gravity, and water inevitably taking the path of least resistance, you can see that both come together here to form the Zen Waterfall in the basement. (Evidently, it's easier to get under the house than around it. Weee!)

The slope is fairly steep, and the valley is right against the house. Do you see the little yellow dump truck in the distance (near the middle of the shot, but way in the back)? To the left of that is a HUGE stump that prevents water from flowing away from the house. So, we've got to do something about that. The white things sticking up are the stakes for the fence, and we kinda-sorta figured it might be best to deal with the drainage issues before we put the fence up rather than try to finagle it around the fence later.

You can see all kinds of things in the photo above: the family pirate, James and Zorak doing a little survey work, Me-Wa playing with the heavy equipment, and in the foreground, my dead salad garden boxy-area-thing. Busy space.

This is a closer shot of Me-Wa grading the back yard to redirect the runoff. Until now, it has always flowed from the upper meadow, straight toward the house. Whatever didn't go into the basement, ran alongside the house until it found a way in, and then, finally, down toward the carport/fire thing, as a last ditch effort. Now, it will hopefully run *around* the house, and down the valley farther from the house, into the creek.

Now, here, you can see that they'd levelled quite a bit. They did more after I took this shot, but it rained last night, and I'm surrounded by an 80-foot-wide swath of mud and mire from every exit except the balcony door. (The mud pit goes all the way around both the front and back of the house.)

The guys found a concrete slab by the basement window, so we used that as the basis for the new grade. It all slopes away from the house, toward the middle of the mud swath, which will one day be green and lush and hopefully not boggy in the least (if we did our math correctly!)

And this is the best that could be done with the time allowed for the rental, and the equipment itself. As you can see, they did get the sidewalk torn up and moved down to the driveway. I haven't braved the mud swath to get to the barn yet, but they also put a good-sized dent in the garden by the barn.

This is basically our final grade. Again, they did a bit more after I retired the camera (the gutter drain is gone now and that corner's been built up and contoured, for example). From what I understand, we need a tractor and a Harley Rake, or a bobcat and a box blade to do the finish work at this point. (For the record: that last sentence is entirely Greek to me, and since I'm spooling up on carpools, schedules, and meals-to-go, that's Zorak's ball to run with this week. Once he fills me in on what we're doing and why, I'll be sure to let ya know.)

The kids had a BLAST this weekend, between playing with Me-Tae, playing in the dirt, helping Dad and Me-Wa... it was just good, good, good.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy

Well, that was a shocker!

We got a lot done!

Well, Zorak and the boys did. I, um, well, I got one curtain made. Heh. Yeah. (Mere, never did find the thread, but I did find the empty bag! I asked around, but nobody saw anything. Nobody knows anything. *snicker* Fortunately, I did find an old spool of white and made that work. I hope it holds!) The rest of my productivity was mostly the same productivity I have every week: made bread, did laundry, cleaned the kitchen. Nothing to blog about, really. So, um, I'll stop and talk about something else.

Zorak, however, really romped on the chores. He got four 6-foot fence panels built (this is for fencing in the back yard - it'll hold domestic critters, namely Balto and the children), plus three corner posts. Big old H-posts that'll hold up to the strain of children clamboring over them (because it's so much more fun to climb a fence than go through a gate when you're little). We figure if you're big enough to climb the fence, then you're big enough to be let out of the fenced yard without Mom having to worry. A premeditated rite-of-passage, if you will.

John learned how to make mortise and tenon joints. He would make a fantastic carpenter. The boy loves to channel his inner Pa Ingalls.

They worked more on their derby cars. The race is Saturday! Yikes, that came up quickly!

We had a bonfire Saturday evening. It was a gorgeous night, with a clear sky and no wind. The kids brought their chili down and ate around the fire. Zorak and I snuggled on a chunk of wood and basked in the warmth of it all - the fire, the children, the life we've built. That felt very good.

We did get a dumptruck of dirt delivered. Then it rained, and rained, and rained some more. Then it was cold and wet. So, we skipped the skid steer this weekend. No sense in using large machinery to rip up the land when we have four perfectly capable children who will do it for just the cost of food.

The children played quite happily in the rain, and the mud, and the cold. I wanted so badly to get a picture of it, but the camera was out in the Suburban, and I'm not a child who is willing to go out in the rain and the mud and the cold for something that doesn't involve my immediate survival (or comfort - I'd do it for comfort). So you'll just have to take my word for it that they were really quite adorable out there. The little drowned wharf-rats. :-)

The boys were so busy working and planning and playing that it took them until this afternoon to find the dirt pile. We may not even have to go down there to spread it all out, by the time they're done with it! They had a fantastic afternoon and only one of them made it more than three pages into tonight's story. That's a sign of a Very Good Day.

In all, it was a Very Good Weekend. More productive than most. Plenty of time to enjoy the little things. We ate like kings with fresh bread, venison steaks and saffron rice and steamed veggies. I made a dump cake, which didn't last much past supper. Little things. Good things. Can't complain.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy