What Works For Some...

It's probably just us. I get that. But tonight, when Zorak returned with the Big Boys from Scouts, he told me just not to bother trying to take them next week. (He's got work stuff to do, and so I'd planned to take them, instead.)

You see, our Pack seems to have a few... oh, "behavioral issues". Some of it's not dangerous, just rude. Things like making loud fake snoring noises while the den leader is trying to discuss the calendar; making rude and inappropriate jokes about the adults, in front of everyone; squirrelling around at inappropriate times; getting into scraps when physical horseplay gets out of hand. The bigger kids show absolutely no cognizance that there are smaller ones in the Pack, and the tone is definitely one of every-man-for-himself.

But some of it is also pretty dangerous. There's a marked lack of respect for private property, personal space, and basic safety guidelines. More than once, Zorak has overheard and thwarted schemes that, if enacted, would have had disastrous results for everyone involved.

And the thing is, while it's not the entire group, it's not just one or two troublemakers, either. It's your traditional bell curve, only the bulk of it in the middle is poorly behaved kids, with a few truly stellar little snarkbats at one end and a few truly delightful kids on the other end. The meetings are a constant series of interruptions, to the point that very little gets done.

The leadership seems to be at a loss as to how to deal with it. And since it all takes place in front of the very parents, themselves, who also do nothing to rectify the situation (they are busily chatting away, ignoring the meeting and the business at hand, themselves - too occupied to listen to what's taking place, let alone address their children's behaviors), that leaves us lacking warm fuzzies. We aren't certain if they just don't know how to deal with it, or if this is their "normal". Once we figure that out, we'll know better how to proceed. Now, how to figure that part out?

In the meantime, though, the boys enjoy the work, the projects, and the activities. So, it's worth slogging through the weirdness and finding a happy middle ground. Thankfully, the boys also tend to gravitate on their own toward the better-behaved kids, which keeps our stress levels from skyrocketing.

Zorak plans to continue on, trying to help redirect the kids who need redirecting, and in the meantime, he hopes to figure out if this is an area where he can help make a difference. If it turns out that the kids and the adults are all quite happy with the status quo, and have no desire to make changes, then we definitely are not going to try to strongarm them into doing it "our way". I mean, if you're happy, you're happy, and we can certainly respect that. We, however, can't be happy with this situation for a long-term choice, for our family. We really do think children can do better, when they have the guidance and modeling to figure it out.

So next week, we'll have a Scout Night at home and work on something the boys have been wanting to tackle. It should be fun.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy