Not Since May??

I knew I hadn't blogged in a while, but since May? Wow. That's going to leave a dent in the kids' memory album (because honestly, I gave up on keeping those about two weeks after John was born, so the blog is pretty much it).

2013 wasn't a great year. It wasn't horrible, and in the grand scheme of things, it wasn't even A Bad Year. It was just hard. It was a year of upheaval and disappointments, of finding out people don't always care about your children like you thought they did. And that you weren't as diligent about protecting them as you thought you were. It was a year of remaining in limbo. There wasn't much positive I could say about much of what was going on.

That year, my entire family decided to take it in turns so that when I sat down at the computer someone took it as the Prime opportunity to talk to me, or sit next to me and eat things that make a lot of noise when you eat them, or just sit and stare at me (oddly, that wasn't the most bothersome of the three choices. weird.) Since I couldn't write about what was going on in general, and it seemed weird to make them Go Away so that I... didn't write, I turned off the screen and spent more time with them. We talked. We ate. We sat and stared at each other. It was good.

That turned out to be the best thing possible, and it contributed to our getting through 2013 without alienating each other or running off to Juarez to apprentice as streetside bootmakers. I'm glad for that. Not that some of the boys wouldn't make excellent bootmakers, but if that's the path one of them chooses, I want him to be driven by passion rather than a desire to get away.

I did get to take a road trip for my birthday (complete with stops at interesting places, a schedule that only needed to coordinate to grown up bladders, and really great travel food). It was a week filled with lovely people, a fantastic seminar, and so much wisdom and beauty that my brain wanted to explode. That was an amazing experience. I am so thankful to Z for helping to make that happen.

As of right now, we're still in limbo. Z is still looking for openings out West. The house is still a work in progress. The boys are no longer in Scouts (although it has nothing to do with the national membership changes - it was local and general issues - the timing of it made the whole thing a little bizarre, though). Jacob completed his Arrow of Light, and James and John managed to earn Life rank, although they didn't have it awarded to them before they left the Troop. I don't know what that means for the future, or for their plans. If it's important to them, they'll let me know.

The positives we have on our side are in droves, however. The house is keeping us warm and safe during "The Polar Vortex of '14". Everyone is growing and maturing beautifully. Z and I are on the same page most days and having a great time with each other and our family. We have a somewhat-viable-kind-of-sort-of-plan (with a thousand contingencies) to deal with the choices that remain. (Ha! Limbo!) We have beautiful friends, many blessings, and hope for the future.

That's not a bad way to start the year. Not bad, at all.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy