The Wedding Cake

When several significant events happen in one fell swoop, I have a difficult time deciding how to blog them. Together? Separately? If so, then which one first? This was a busy, chaotic weekend, and there are several things to share. I've wrangled with how best to share them, and finally decided to begin with the frivolous and move on from there. This will, hopefully, allow me the opportunity to find the words to do the more serious subjects justice. I hope you'll understand.

And so, we have to begin the story with The Wedding Gremlin. This little critter is the reason they're so darned cute when they're little...

For two days, we commandeered Taryn's kitchen. We mixed and sloshed. We kneaded and plied. We made a fondant for the cake, and made dozens of rolled fondant flowers. We made gardenias, calla lilies, and stephanotis-ish-thingies. (The technical term, I believe, is "fantasy flowers".) We rolled, pressed, trimmed, shaped, and hogged the window unit to coax them to dry. By Friday night, the fridge was packed with flower bits and random stamen parts. It almost looked like we knew what we were doing. We went to bed that night, content in the knowledge that we had created lovely, edible flowers for the cake without wire, tape, or any pesky toxic inedible bits. Ahhh. Life was good, indeed.

Four o'clock Saturday morning, I awoke to the unsettling sensation that there was *plenty* of room in the bed. Ahhhh... where's EmBaby? I slipped from the bed to look for her. She hadn't fallen off (or at least she wasn't unconscious on the floor.) She wasn't in the bathroom. Oh, no! The bedroom door's open! I bolted into the kitchen and there, on the floor, beneath the table, sat the cutest little thing with her Little Cindy Lou Who Jammies and her big bright eyes, a rolling pin in one hand and the remnants of a lily in the other. She beamed up at me, her fuzzy hair radiating about her head in a very poor imitation of a halo, and said, "Mmm, YUM!"

Oh, it was a massacre. There were dead flowers all over the place. And worst of all, the groom's cake, a crawdad, had been maimed. She ate one of his eyes, twisted his little feelers, and poked holes in his head! Poor, gimpy crawdad.

I cleaned up the mess, salvaged the flowers that hadn't made it onto the floor yet, and brought the little Wedding Gremlin back to bed. I wish I'd taken a picture. If I hadn't been fighting a massive eye twitch, I might have thought to do that. Zorak did get a picture of the little Wedding Gremlin's next escapade, though. So, here you go. If you're having a wedding, and you see one of these things, BEWARE! They will eat everything decorative and/or sugary that they can get their hands on!

Of course, the week of the wedding was warm and humid. While that made for lovely swimming weather, it wasn't so great for the icing plans. The fondant gave me fits. Due to extenuating circumstances, we'd lost about four hours of work time Saturday, which left us having to send John (the ring bearer) ahead with the family, while we stayed behind to finish the cake. Final decision -- buttercream the 12" layer, because this fondant is NOT going to happen on that layer. Oh, folks, I wanted to cry. Wait. I did cry. Not for long, though, since we didn't have time to waste.

We finished the cake. We got it to the reception hall at the Very Last Minute. It wasn't exactly what we were shooting for, but all things considered, everyone was pleased. Er, at least kind. Heh. (Have I mentioned how Very Much I love our family?) And here you have it:


The happy couple did the requisite duties and cut the cake. (He spared her lovely gown, though, which, I think, made every woman in the room breathe a sigh of relief.)

We may never be asked to make another cake for a family event. But we're still up for childwatching duties, so that's good.

Kiss those babies!
~Dy